Hi all. It’s October! My favorite month. Despite what the calendar tells you, this is the month that feels like the beginning. Maybe that’s residual from living by an academic calendar? Anyway, some quick background before I start my day.
– My laptop is dying; specifically the “S” is shorting out. I will try to go back and proof this, but if I miss an S, that’s on me. (I do know how to spell).
– My personal assessment on Muncie was recently featured in EDLM. It was ill-tempered, yet honest. It was the one about me being disconnected and indifferent to the town or community here. This whole concept has been causing me a lot of stress lately, and I recently had a bit of a breakdown; I let a number of people close to me know about my feelings on this….about how I don’t feel part of the community, and “just want to go home.” I admitted that no one back home welcomed me when I was recently there, and how so many people here have been very nice to me. While I don’t now, nor will I ever feel like a Hoosier, I do feel much more comfortable here. I am not nearly as panicked about leaving here as soon as I can. I wish I could divest myself of this hold that connects me to a place that is becoming more and more irrelevant.
– My car has been in the shop for the past 4 days, and it may or may not be a repair bill too large to worry about doing. I really can’t afford a new car payment, although I am rather sick of my current car.
– My job is such that it’s a huge part of my life, and also it’s a fairly public one. It will be very difficult to talk about my day today while keeping this anonymous. I’ll try my best.
4:05am – Woke up, and immediately thought I was late for work. Looked at the edge of the blackout curtains, and I couldn’t see any sunlight trying to get in. I remembered that I have to document today, so I looked at what time it was. Was glad to know I still had plenty of time.
7:07am – Woke up again, and checked to make sure I’m not late for work. I have to work late, until 10:30, but a last-minute meeting was scheduled this morning for 8:30am. So after this meeting, I will have 6 hours to fill. I was just having a dream about being in a work meeting. In it, I decided to put a wig on a broom handle, and go around having it talk to people, and all the co-workers thought it was hilarious. The wig broom was asking them creepy things like “Have you checked on your dogs lately?”, but they all loved it! Weird. It was rather like an old John Green skit or something. I got up, and got ready for work. My hubby and me are riding in to work together. (We work for the same company). I’ll then leave, in his car, after the meeting and come back to do lunch with him. We stop for coffee on the way…it never fails to amaze me how people will wait in a drive-thru line for 20 minutes when they can just park and come in for their coffee in a third of the time.
8:30-9:30am – The half-hour meeting was necessary but unexciting. I took my leave, and on my way home stopped by my office to do one quick thing. My boss was there, and when I was leaving out, I said “I’ll see you this afternoon.” She only glared at me. I wonder what I did this time to get her perturbed at me. Showing up for 5 minutes to do an email off-the-clock? Seems as though it’s something every week. She and I really don’t mix, and I have wondered for 5 years if it’s her or me.
9:30-11:30am – I arrived home, and started doing some chores. Dishes. Laundry. Sweeping. I sat down to write the first part of this journal, and as the computer was booting, the auto shop called. My car is all done, and it turned out not to be a fatal repair. I will go in after lunch to pay for it, and then come back after work tonight to pick it up. Music while cleaning: a Smiths concert from German TV, 1984. I know that Morrissey has turned into quite the racist old crank in recent years, so I was curious so see if I could spot any inordinately douchey behavior during the Smiths years. The video does that thing that concert footage from Europe in the ‘80s does…flashing the name of each song on the chyron a full minute or more into each song. It’s cute. It’s October…it shouldn’t be almost 90 outside.
11:30am-1:45pm – Back at home now after going to pick up the hubby and doing lunch. I arrived at his work at 11:45, and sat in the car waiting until noon. It’s amazing how hot it is outside. While waiting, I get a message that the person running the event at my work tonight will have to cancel. So now I have to improvise. By the time the hubby comes out for lunch, I have replacement volunteers. We need to look at this series; it will continue into 2020, but various scheduling and staffing adjustments will have to be made for it to run more smoothly. Given the $1500 I will have had to pay for 2 car repairs in the last 3 weeks, we are having to pay attention to coupons that come in the mail for a change…so a bargain-basement fast-food lunch along Madison Street it is. Work crews in bright safety yellow shirts and knock-off Oakley sunglasses complain about things at tables around ours while we eat. My hubby tries to console me and my concerns about money and staffing of my events, which is really very kind of him, as he has had his own mental strains of late. I get him back over to his work by 1, at which point I drive to the repair shop, pay for my car, tell them that I will have to wait until 10:30 or 11 to come pick it up, then leave to grab a haircut before returning home to get ready for work. While sitting in the chair, I notice how much I am letting myself go. I am so doughy and it’s awful…unhealthy. I really wish I had the will to prioritize exercise into my weekly routine. This is definitely not a fat-shaming thing. I myself am a chubby chaser. It’s just that my personal weight gain experience is the “I’ve given up” kind, not the “I’m naturally fluffy” kind. The haircut is at a place on McGalliard; I really need to stop spending money in that part of town. I don’t like the idea of financially supporting urban sprawl. Next time I need a haircut, I’ll look for something downtown…or something that is not a chain at least.
1:45pm-2:15pm – I get back home and finish the Smiths video while I type this. I plug in my dead phone.
2:15pm-3:00pm – Took a quick shower to get rid of hair stubble. Got ready for work again, and was in to work by 2:45.
3:00pm-10:30pm – My work day. Although it was the biggest chunk of my day, there is not much to be said about it. It was a bit slow, and there were no fires to put out or last-minute anything to do. I had several conversations with co-workers about work stuff. None of it worth repeating here really. Co-workers were in good spirits. I really was just looking forward to getting my car, and going home. At about 9:45 my hubby arrives with my dinner, and wait for me to finish up at work before I lock up the building and we head off to fetch my car.
10:30pm-11:00pm – Muncie is quiet and the night is cool and still as I’m standing out in the auto repair yard unlocking my car. As much as I don’t like it, I’m glad to have it back. Its interior smells like a shop now. The radio station is tuned to something I’ve never sought out myself. There are 7.1 more miles on the odometer. My hubby didn’t wait for me; he’s already half-way home by now probably. The gas needle was below the E line, so I stopped at the Payless gas station for $15 worth. Parked at home, and went in…and I can hear the Star Trek lasers from outside the door. The hubby is at his little work table re-doing his nails. The cat greeted me. It was a peaceful scene to come home to. It is 11:04 and I am laying in bed, finishing this document. My worries are still with me, but at least I can worry about them comfortably.