Editorial Note: Diarist A05 first submitted the diary entry on November 14, 2024. While we had received the entry, the diarist, uncertain of its successful transmission, graciously chose to rewrite and resubmit it. We have consolidated both versions of the diaries in their appropriate order.
I usually wake up with the Sun. Today is a cloudy day. Still I woke up early enough to meditate and take a shower before I left to drive my Grandson L to school. This morning I am a little tired because I stayed up past my usual bedtime of 9:30pm. My longtime friend B.D. is visiting from Massachusetts. We learned to play guitar when we were Sixteen and while I have always had a guitar she really learned to play. Last night she and I went to an open mic at Room 5 Piano Bar which is new in Muncie. She is a natural performer and I was happy to be out for the evening with her. I don’t go out much anymore because my husband J and I keep a pretty tight schedule while we’re raising our Grandson L.
As I was fixing toast and jelly for L this morning. L expressed his disappointment that I had disappeared some of his clothes to make room for new ones. Of course I should have involved him in the process of rearranging his room now that he is eleven and 5’2″ but I did not. I am guilty as charged. I reminisce about the same scenario that occurred thirty some years ago between his Aunt K and I. His Dad never cared much about that sort of invasion of privacy.
So, I save everything that I think is useful, that is unless it belongs to someone else and it’s deemed by me to be of no use. It may well be a personality defect with regards to human rights. At this point in time I have no more room in Google Docs and I am starting to believe that Google is going to have its way with me for another $9.00 per month. This is why I am forced to use email for Diary Day.
Thursdays are a float day for my Massage Therapy business but, I have a yoga class to teach at 4pm. which is why my husband J picks L up from Northside Middle School at 4pm.
This morning I watched my friend who was never a coffee drinker slowly savor her French pressed coffee with hazelnut cream while I dedicated myself to caffeine abstinence after fifty years of guzzling. I had my usual green smoothie with a banana, cucumber, wild blueberries, homegrown kale , spirulina, amm;a powder, three monster sixe calcium tablets and oat milk.I have been thinking that my nervous system requires a little more nutrition.
My husband J drove while B-D and I sat together in the back seat. We talked a mile a minute of nothing in particular. We met a mutual friend from our teenage years at Paynes restaurant in Gas City. D was enthusiastic about showing us his art stained glass windows . He has done a beautiful job of creating the ambiance. BD and I had wonderful vegetarian soups and salads and the guys had the house specialty FishnChips. I think it’s one of Indiana’s best restaurants.
During our meal I asked about another friend who had lived in Farmland who I had heard play music at the opening of the restaurant. D said oh by the way she died. I was struck with emotion. She had met her husband who was in the Peace corp in Chili. I remembered giving her Chilian Mother a massage in 1985.She was my age! He said, “alright you have about thirty seconds”.”People live and then they die”.
We all drove to Fairmount to see the James Dean Museum which has been relocated from its historic mansion. Then we proceed to D’s Mothers Vintage Record Store. It is an amazing collection of music history and is no longer available to the general public. May the Music never die. Some things never die and yet the history of a life may be forever lost. Do the items hold a history of his family grief? I wonder how many years will go by before his memories of the music store that he grew up stocking after school fade.
Today L’s Mother is supposed to take him to get his vaccinations updated so that he can stay in public school. I don’t have custody so she takes that responsibility as his legal guardian. I feel the weight of this though he lives with us full time.
My friend can check in on her work while I teach Yoga this afternoon.
My yoga class brings some relaxation and peace.
We will go out to Tuppee Tong tonight and sit around playing old tunes that we were still working on after fifty years of friendship.
I have had a shoulder injury and developed a tremor in my strumming hand so I struggle to keep up with my friend and my husband J. Well I tell myself at least i can still sing.
L starts piano lessons again on Monday with a teacher who was a friend of his Dads. Musically they were buddies I told him. It will be more fun with this guy than it was when you tried it a couple of years ago. Your Dad was a great musician.
Diary Day Thursday November 14th 2024
Thursdays are usually a float day. I don’t usually see clients. I have only one yoga class. I’m always up by 6:30am when I enjoy time alone meditating , doing yoga and preparing food that I prefer. I have been avoiding caffeine, alcohol and sugar. I am a month into this cleanse and starting to feel the benefit of my morning green smoothie, I really don’t wake up tired now. I thought I might die as I dragged myself around during the first week of withdrawals, I have done this a few times over the years and always gravitate back to strong coffee and steamed milk.after a few weeks. Now at age sixty-six I have decided it is not good for me. I have after forty years of practicing as a massage therapist developed a tremor in my right arm and hand. I hope that it is just normal wear and tear but, I wonder if it is trauma related. I have lost many family members and loved ones to alcohol related deaths. I think the human nervous system can only handle so much. I have also been diagnosed with a benign brain tumor and I plan to see a neurologist although it is unlikely that I will accept medical intervention for any of it.
I am determined to stay healthy and strong. I must. My Grandson L is living with us, so today is my day to take him to school by 8:45am and pick him up at 4pm. My husband J usually picks him up from school and takes him to the various activities that he is involved with. Muncie Civic Theater offers a great Theater Education program for kids. L also takes Martial Arts instruction. He is privileged, I know. Most of the rest of the time he plays video games which I don’t interfere with since he does really well at Northside middle School.
My longtime friend is visiting us from Massachusetts. She will be up having coffee when I get home. I’ll enjoy making the steamed milk for her and watching her energy rise to meet the day. She and I started playing guitar together when we were sixteen. She never had children and is now retired and plays] in a couple of bands and writes her own music. She is awesome. I may be a little envious but I try not to let it show. I am really sad that I cannot seem to find the rhythm since injuring my shoulder and developing the tremor. We are planning an open jam for tomorrow. She and J will play music most of the day on Friday.
4:30pm J and BD and I spent the day in Fairmount where we met up with a friend who helped build the displays at the James Dean Museum. We ate at Payne’s restaurant which is one of my favorites. He told us of a friend’s death in the middle of lunch. I held back my tears.
8pm We had dinner at Tuppee Tong, another one of my favorites. I just didn’t feel like cooking and that way J and L could eat chicken while my friend and I had tofu.
My Grandson just came in to tell me that it might be easier for me to speech to text. He migh be right. I don’t type well enough for this to be easy.
I told him thanks for the insight and then “Have you brushed your teeth yet”. I like the idea of taking time out to self reflect on how i am feeling. I don’t want the entirety of what I think and feel to come from any of the News reports especially now. Peace to anyone who reads my words.