EDLM
June 4, 2025
I started my day at 6:19. Today consists of two weekly meetings I look forward to attending. They are with people with whom I resonate and they help me feel less alone in a society and world that is becoming more and more hostile and dangerous.
In a world and time of scams, lies, blatant disregard for law and order, abusive uses of AI, cutting Federal funding for needed country-wide social services, undermining the checks and balances in our government that holds our elected officers responsible for their actions, distrust of our government and our neighbors is running rampant. When my neighbor with an AR-15 practices his weapon sounding like a machine gun disturbs the neighborhood, we all wonder about how this neighbor will use such a weapon.
So my first meeting consists of a brunch with three people including myself. We talk about what’s happening in our lives and how we’re dealing with those life issues. We don’t talk about the weather nor sports. We talk about things that matter the most to us, making it through our daily living.
We all fear the outlook of our country and the path our “elected” president is taking. The administration he surrounds himself with is corrupt, self-serving and ignorant of the responsibilities and job descriptions they oversee. Ignorant and blatantly hostile to the constitution of the United States, they are out to create an authoritarian government where the extremely wealthy oligarchy control power and wealth at the expense of the people of the nation. So we three talk about what we can do, how we can survive, who to go to for honest and truthful news and information about our country and politics.
We talk about heart issues, relationships and our responses to life as it unfolds for us.
Another theme that keeps my attention is a quote from the movie “Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil”. This is a 1994 non-fiction book by John Berendt put into a movie. The quote is something close to, “Don’t spend too long living in the world of the dead and forget the world of the living.” This is my loose remembrance of the script near the end of the movie. It questions my last five years living after the death of my husband. Have I spent too long in the world of the dead and forgotten the world of the living? This question haunts me.
In some ways I can answer it as a “Yes”. I have struggled to hold onto the life I had with him. It was the happiest time of my life. I was not ready to let it go.
I have grieved and longed for his presence. Despite head knowledge of reality, it takes the heart so much longer to accept and adjust to it . . . years, in fact.
So I share this recognition to the grief group I continue to attend.
Revelations continue to make themselves known throughout the grief process. I was not expecting for the process to be life-long, but it is true.
The rest of the day includes groceries at Meijer and watching comedies on the TV at night. Comedies and uplifting stories of romance and connection helps me get through the evenings.
Because of the stress of politics, grief, longing, over-whelming tasks of caring for my property and decisions yet to be made, light-hearted input at night soothes the soul. Older familiar songs and instrumentals listened to during the day helps maintain a sense of grounding.
Life for all of us is a huge challenge. We share in the struggle. If only we trusted each other enough to tell our stories, we would realize how close we are to each other. Our barriers would come down and we could encourage life’s energy with honesty and openness.